Title: Friends Shouldn’t Let Enemies Sing Drunk

Author: Gillian Silverlight

Distribution: My site: http://www.homestead.com/gilliansspikelair/, those that already have permission to post my fic, all others please ask. (If you post my fic. Please do not rearrange the sentence groupings. It can alter the flow of the story. Thanks.)

Disclaimer: They belong to Joss and the WB, UPN, FX; just about everybody except me. I just play with them.

Summary: Angel encounters a familiar female vampire in Las Vegas and learns about Spike’s feelings for Buffy. Two drunken vampires and a karaoke bar can only end dismally funny when one of them is Harmony.

Rating: NC-17

Dedication: As always, many thanks to my wonderful Beta, Patti and my sister, Dyane Windshadow for their proofing and assistance. Also to Saber Shadow kitten and Bob Hobbs who made this casual suggestion one evening at DragonCon while we sat in a bar listening to the mind-numbing tone of the drunken karaoke ‘singers’.

Friends Shouldn’t Let Enemies Sing Drunk

Harmony Kendall, former Sunnydale High student, stared out the bus window at the swiftly rushing night scenery. She hadn’t really wanted to leave Los Angeles, but realizing she’d severely damaged her relationship with Cordelia by betraying her, the blond sat morosely in her seat. To top it all off, she was also hungry and didn’t dare eat any of her fellow passengers.

Harmony was a vampire.

Thoughts tumbled through her head as she gazed out with unseeing eyes. The horrible relationship she’d had with Spike, only to discover that after all his fond comments about Druscilla, his lover of a hundred years, that the idiot bleached blonde vampire was actually in love with Buffy! The fact that Buffy was the vampire Slayer obviously hadn’t penetrated his thick skull yet, even though Buffy’d previously spent several years desperately in love with Angel, who was also a vampire.

Harmony shook her head slightly. *I think they deserve each other. He’s stupid enough to love a Slayer! Buffy?!? Eeewww! Buffy’s just a vamp ho anyway… Maybe Spike will get lucky, then she’ll stake him right in the middle of it! It’d serve them both right. Stupids. *

Marginally happier with those thoughts, Harmony sat back in her seat, wishing again for the umpteenth time that the bus would finally get to Las Vegas where she could lose herself in the bright lights and glittering throng of people. Some of whom she knew would never be missed.

Shortly before sunrise, the bus pulled into the station. Harmony collected her small bag and hurried through the visibly lightening sky, seeking a place to hide for the day.

******************************

Angel enjoyed the wind through his hair as he drove with the top down on his black convertible along the night-dark highway. Not even a seventy mile an hour wind could move his hair, but he still enjoyed the sense of freedom it hinted at.

He was on his way to Las Vegas just to get away from the recent pressure he’d been feeling and to visit with Lorne. The green skinned demon was doing a month long show at a friend’s lounge while Caritas was being repaired; its most recent injuries received while another group had tried to injure, kill or otherwise maim the gang at Angel Investigations… again.

Angel could almost taste the sunrise on the air; it was so close; yet he knew he had plenty of time to reach his destination. He had a room reserved at a small hotel on the edge of town. The owner was an old friend and had even promised to have a stock of Angel’s favorite drink laid in for him. The brunette was looking forward to a good glass of fresh O negative.

Yep, Angel was also a vampire.

************************************

Harmony leaned against the wall of the alleyway, looking at the remains of her meal through an alcoholic haze that created halos around every nearby light.

The man she’d had for dinner had been intoxicated since he’d lost the title to his car, the deed to his home and all of his self-respect more than three weeks before at a casino crap table. Now the pretty blonde vampire, who had relieved him of his burdensome life as she’d drank him almost dry, was also the unwilling recipient of his raging drunk.

*Wow! Feel kinda weird. Stupid man must’a been drunk or sumthin’. Better go find sumthin’ else to eat so I can feel (hic) better. *

Letting her shoulder slide against the grimy wall to help support her, Harmony walked out onto the sidewalk, trying to find the closest door and a meal not quite so alcohol rich.

*********************************

Angel took a seat at a small table on the side of the lounge where he’d be sheltered by the shadows. He’d asked the waiter about Lorne only to discover that the green-skinned demon was between shows and wouldn’t be on stage for another couple of hours. In the meanwhile, the management was having fun with the tipsy customers and a karaoke machine.

Angel sipped his drink and tried to not listen to the often metal-bending tones coming from the stage and the laughing, drunken patrons.

This particular lounge didn’t cater specifically to demons or vampires, so the dark-haired vampire’d had to order regular alcohol instead of his preferred bloody Mary made with real blood. He knew he should be careful, as he wasn’t really used to actual drinking. He’d always left that onerous job to Spike.

* Funny, I haven’t thought of that blonde idiot in quite a while… Just as well. After our last encounter he’s not one of my favorite people, not that he ever really was… I wonder where he went after he got his ass kicked in exchange for that ring? *

Angel shrugged slightly to himself and sipped his drink again, amazed to find the ice cubes rattling in the bottom of the virtually empty glass.

Within moments of the icy tinkle, the waiter was at his elbow with a refill, whisking the empty glass out of his hand.

Angel glanced around the room as he sipped his fresh drink only to be caught in mid-sigh as he spotted a shining fall of blonde hair that looked suspiciously familiar.

Harmony spotted Angel at the same instant he realized who the blonde hair belonged to, and she bore down on his table, swaying against other customers as she tried to walk.

Quickly grasping her elbow, Angel eased her into a chair.

“Harmony, what’s wrong with you? What are you doing here?”

“Hi, Angel! Not sure what’s wrong. I th’nk my dinner was bad, maybe.”

“Dinner? You drank somebody here?!”

“No, silly… Out that way…” She waved a hand airily off to one side, “in an alley. I hadn’t had anyth’ng to eat since… since I lef’ ‘fore Cordy shot me. Would she really ha’done’tha?” Harmony peered up slightly at the other vampire, amazed that she’d never really noticed that he was actually kind of attractive.

“So you drank some… ah, thing, that was full of alcohol on an empty stomach?”

Angel hissed at her through clenched teeth as the waiter walked behind him to stand beside Harmony. The dark-haired vampire accepted but didn’t approve of the fact that Harmony was going to feed, as he himself used to do; but the blonde was too scatter-brained to watch what she might inadvertently say or to whom, in a drunken state.

“Yeah, guess so.” She looked up at the waiter, calmly waiting, a vacant smile plastered on his face. “Bloody Mary, ok?” the tipsy blonde vampire told the man, who then hurried away to fetch her drink.

Angel quickly grabbed her arm, as he tried to tell the waiter to ignore the order, but the slender man was already gone, heading toward the bartender with purpose.

“You don’t need anything else to drink! They don’t have… our kind of drinks here, Harmony.”

“S’okay. Might be better th’s way. Maybe I jush need a good drunk. Nobody likes me. Cordy wa’s gonna kill me. ME! I wa’s her best-est friend in school an’ she’d do th’s to me.”

“You tried to get us all killed!” Angel snarled at the ditzy blonde.

“Well, DUH!! I am still a vam…”

Angel had covered her mouth with his hand to keep anyone else from hearing Harmony as her voice had risen with each word.

“Shhhh! You want to get us both in trouble here? Keep it down, ok? And just don’t say… You know.”

“You’re jush weird, Angel. Cute, but weird. Spike wouldna cared who heard me. He’d hit’em for me.” She pursed her lips into a pout as she looked at the attractive vampire, who was holding her arm again.

“Spike?! What tha’ hell… What does Spike have to do with anything?”

“He’s tha’ reason I went to see Cordy in ta’ first place. Him and all his stupid Dru’dzilla and bein’ in love with Buffy.”

Harmony jerked her arm away, leaning back in her chair, a pink-tinged tear sliding down her cheek as the waiter handed her a deep red drink, of which she promptly guzzled half. Angel stared at her in shock.

**********************************

As soon as the waiter left the table, Angel leaned closer to Harmony grabbing her shoulder, gripping it tighter than he’d intended, “What do you mean Spike’s in love with Buffy? When did you see Druscilla?”

“Geeze, Angel… Tense much? God… Spike wa’s my blondie-bear, my honey… But he… he jus’ got … mean, after he found that stupid ring! He… he staked me! ME! If I haddana had tha’ ring on, he’d ha’ killed me! But I loved him, ya know? So I took’im back. And we wer’okay. Jush fine. ‘Til tha’ shtupid Shlayer started hangin’ ‘round…”

Harmony downed the rest of her drink, finishing it only seconds after Angel tossed down his third, and both signaled for the waiter.

With smooth efficiency, the man had two more drinks on the table in moments.

“Just keep us both filled and run a tab, please.” Angel asked the man before he turned away.

“I can bring you and the lady a pitcher if you’d like, Sir?”

The waiter was an old hand with the bar patrons of Las Vegas. He knew that the smooth service and alcohol would leave them very generous at the end of the evening, so he tried hard to keep them happy.

“Yeah. Yeah, good idea. Bring a pitcher for each of us.” Angel looked into the fresh glass only to find the liquid had strangely disappeared again. He was beginning to wonder if he needed a bigger glass.

Minutes later, a large pitcher in front of each of the distressed vampires, and glasses in hand, Angel urged Harmony to continue with her tale.

“Lik’ I sa’d, we were happy, th’n Buffy kept findin’ excuses to talk to my Spikey… I tried to mov’on… Ya know, be my own vam… ah, woman. But he kept comin’ back. Wann’d’a play games. Wan’d me ta’ dress up like her an’ catch’im. But he wa’sh so good ta' me af’er.”

Harmony paused to pour another glass full, only vaguely noting that Angel’s pitcher was almost empty.

“Then there wa’sh hish Dru’dz’lla one night. He wa’sh gonna shtake her too… Told Buffy he lubbed her… It hurt, ya know? Shtupid Shlayer… helped him thr’w ush both out.”

Harmony refilled her glass and then proceeded to empty it in one long swallow.

“Spike? Spike loves Buffy? He was gonna kill Dru for Buffy?”

Emotions flitted across Angel’s face in rapid succession; shock, anger, jealousy, dismay, anger again, followed this time by hurt.

Harmony was oblivious to Angel’s fluctuating emotional state as she finished off the pitcher of Bloody Marys in time to hand it to their waiter, as he brought another refill to Angel.

Ignoring the very drunken blonde vampire, Angel settled into serious drinking while he muttered to himself.

‘How could Spike fall in love with her? Why? Does she love him? Is that why she was so… I thought she was with that idiot soldier boy that tried to kill me… Spike?! How could she?! I thought she still loved me... Not that we can be together, of course not. Never with me, get no happiness at all without trying to rip people’s throats out afterwards... Wish I’d ripped Spike’s out when I had a chance, but noooo, I had to be nice…. Nice Angel! Now Spike’s in love with her!’

***********************

The slender waiter, Wally, leaned on the bar, glancing every so often over his shoulder at the couple in the corner. “You know, Joe, I’ve never seen anybody drink like those two over there. Four pitchers each and I lost count of the glasses before they started on the pitchers. It’s almost inhuman!”

“Yeah. But we’ve been getting a few folks like that in here since that new guy’s been doing his ‘green-skinned demon’ act. It wows’em but I got no idea how they can drink like that and stay conscious. Must be some new kinda drug they’re on or such.”

Joe didn’t really care how much the customers drank, as long as they didn’t toss their cookies in the lounge or start any fights. He always got a cut of the tips from the waiters and the way he saw it, the more the folks drank, the better off they all were.

“Maybe I can get them to sing something. Might take their minds off the booze before they pass out and I have to get Dave to check the man’s wallet to pay for the tab.”

“Just tell’em they gotta clear their tab before the show starts…” Joe shrugged as he made the suggestion.

“Yeah, good idea. Thanks, Joe.”

Wally headed toward the corner table, intent on handling the matter of the bar bill before it got out of hand.

**************************

“But I LIKE tha’ song, Angel. Le’sh go shing som’th’ng.”

Harmony tugged slightly at the dark-haired vampire’s arm. Angel had gotten more moody as his thoughts had churned away at her revelations. Now his anger finally had the upper hand, over-riding the hurt he felt. Deep in the back of his mind, an unformed thought struggled for life in all the slosh of drunken brain cells.

“Ok, Harm… wha’ you wanna shing?”

For some reason, Angel thought that just might start to pay Buffy and Spike back for their actions.

“Well, we’re mad at’em but we lub’em, so let’sh do tha’ “Hate M’selsh f’ Lubbin’ You” shong. Bet they got it.”

Harmony looked at Angel through her lashes, while she thought about how handsome he was. She had no idea why she’d never noticed before.

Struggling to her feet, she tugged on Angel’s arm, trying to make him stand up.

When he finally levered himself from the chair, Wally had reached them.

“Did you need anything else, Sir? We need to settle all the tabs before the show starts.”

“Sure… No pr’bl’m. Take m’card. We wanna shing a shong.”

Angel fumbled his credit card from his pocket, handing it to the nice man.

“Certainly, Sir. I can arrange for you to be next before they turn the machine off for the show. Should I add a tip to your bill?”

“Yeah… You’se been real good. Jus’h add wha’ you thing.”

Angel swayed on his feet. Harmony leaned into the tall vampire, snaking her arm around his waist. Trying to remain standing upright was only part of her reason for embracing the taller, attractive vampire.

“We wanna shing ‘Hate M’selsh f’ Lubbin’ You.”

“Yes, M’am. I’ll get that cued up for you immediately then settle up,” he glanced at the name on the card quickly, “… Mr. Angel’s tab.”

Wally turned away to do exactly what he’d promised, not believing his luck!

In moments he had the song set up, the words ready to scroll across the screen for the exceptionally drunk pair. After only a moment’s thought, he pulled two stools close to the microphone for them as well. It wouldn’t do to have them fall over while he was about to have his best week all month closing out their bill.

**************************

They’d managed to agree to take every other line as they weaved their way up to the stage, struggling to sit on the stools Wally had provided for them, and finally having to sit with arms around each other to keep from falling backwards.

Neither of them noticed a certain green-skinned individual watching discreetly from the far wing of the stage.

As Angel leaned closer to Harmony, he noticed how nice her hair smelled.

*Shis’ pretty too…. *

That was as far as he’d managed to think before the music started.

Angel launched right in with the first line…

‘Midnight, gettin' uptight. Where are you?

You said you'd meet me, now it's quarter to two

I know I'm hangin' but I'm still wantin' you.

Hey, Spike, It's a fact they're talkin' in town.’

Harmony had chosen to personalize the song. The lyrics were slurred, neither vampire knew what a key was, much less able to find it, and the entire audience started to cringe as they tried to not listen. Everybody except that certain green guy hiding behind the curtain. His mouth turned up at the corners in the beginning of a grin as he heard behind the song and its painful murder.

‘I turn my back and you're messin' around.

I'm not really jealous; don't like lookin' like a clown.

I think of you ev'ry night and day.

You took my heart, then you took my pride away.

I hate myself for loving you.

Can't break free from the things that you do.

I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why

I hate myself for loving you.’

Blonde and brunette bellowed out the last line of the chorus together, getting the hurt and anger into the lyrics.

Lorne cringed back in the shadows, trying desperately not to burst out laughing at what he ‘saw’.

Daylight, spent the night without you.

But I've been dreamin' 'bout the lovin' you do.

I won't be as angry 'bout the hell you put me through.

Hey, man, bet you can treat me right.

You just don't know what you was missin' last night.

I wanna see your face and say forget it just from spite.

The elusive idea finally congealed in Angel’s pickled brain and his hand slid up Harmony’s side, letting his thumb brush gently against the edge of her breast.

She turned her head to look at him, smiling as she wailed on, but snuggling a bit closer to him.

I hate myself for loving you.

Can't break free from the things that you do.

I wanna walk but I run back to you, that's why

I hate myself for loving you.

I hate myself for loving you.

I hate myself for loving you.

Once more their two voices joined in a rising cacophony of sound on the last line, then all was silence, much to the relief of the few beings still in the lounge.

It hadn’t been exactly a mass exodus, but quite a few people found it necessary to step outside for a cigarette or to visit the restrooms.

Lorne had to retreat to the far back of the stage, struggling to catch his breath after the stifled laugher that had almost choked him.

********************************

Angel had his arm firmly around Harmony, his fingers carefully teasing the underside of her breast through her shirt, guiding her toward the doorway.

Wally caught up to them just before they could leave. He laid a hand on Angel arm, calling the name he believed was the vampire’s. Angel had to struggle momentarily to prevent his face from morphing before he could look at the waiter. The vampire had his mind firmly set on his current objective and his demon saw the waiter’s very normal action as a threat to that goal.

“Yeah?”

“Your card, Mr. Angel. I wouldn’t want you to forget it. And I need your signature please.”

“Oh yeah. Thanks.” Angel held himself in check while he hurriedly signed his name and grabbed his card, shoving it into his pocket before clasping Harmony to him again.

“My room is closh. Go there w’me?” he whispered in her ear, knowing her enhanced hearing would catch every word.

The blonde’s only answer was to turn and kiss him, her face morphing as she bit gently into his bottom lip.

Angel scooped her into his arms and staggered around the corner of the motel heading toward the side entrance for the rooms.

***********************************

Harmony hadn’t wanted to stop the larger vampire when he started to simply rip her clothes off, but her soggy mind finally managed to remember that she didn’t have a spare change with her and stopped him, then took the garments off as rapidly as possible.

He was still undressed before her.

“Oh. M’God! You’re so huge, Angel!”

He pulled her down across the bed, her hair spilling into his lap as he leaned to kiss her again. Just before his lips touched hers, he grinned. It was one of the most wicked grins Harmony had ever seen on a vampire and finally had the first clue of what he might really be like without that soul. She wasn’t sure if the thought thrilled or frightened her.

“Ta’ better ta’ fuck you with…”. Then his lips claimed hers.

**********************************

Harmony knew she was going to be sore, even for a vampire, after this night.

Angel had ravaged her more thoroughly than she thought was possible. There wasn’t a single orifice on her body that he’d not thrust himself in, except maybe her ears, but his tongue had gotten them!

Both of her shoulders were bitten, and as he pounded her into the mattress yet again, she felt a warmth fill her from deep inside, as his body started the telltale trembling once more.

She felt his face morph against her cheek, then the savage pleasure fill her and explode brighter than before as the raggedly sharp fangs sank into her neck just as he drove himself as deeply as possible into her.

Her gasping, un-needed breath turned to screams as pleasure exploded through her body. His mouth pulling hard at her neck, his body filling hers with his own release, the growls deep in his throat vibrated against the torn skin of her neck where he continued to suckle at her.

It was more than she could stand and finally Harmony let her own face shift and her fangs dip into his neck where it pressed against her face as her nails raked furrows down his back.

**********************************

Harmony woke to discover her lower body still partially pinned by Angel’s weight. Wiggling carefully, she managed to shift him off before she eased from the bed to stumble to the bathroom, the night’s alcohol and sex still singing in her veins.

Closing the door, the blonde vampire turned on the light, recoiling at first from the startling brightness, then a second time as she viewed her savaged flesh in the mirror.

There were half-healed bites across her shoulders and on both sides of her neck. Turning slightly to one side then the other, she took in the already healing redness of claw marks from his talons that ran down both sides of her body to the tops of her thighs.

With a self-satisfied smile, Harmony washed off the majority of the blood and other dried fluids with a very hot washcloth. The heat felt wonderful on the blossoming aches.

With a final sigh of satiation, she rinsed out the cloth, walking back into the bedroom to just watch the sleeping nude vampire. Unfortunately, he was laying on one of his better features, she mused silently. A sly smile crossed her face even as she remembered that she didn’t have her own things with her and she headed for the closet with Angel’s bags.

***********************************

Angel woke with a marching brass band holding forth inside his head, enough aches and pains to have been in a major fight and an unexpected weight on his arm, a body pressed tightly against him.

Moving as little as possible, he realized with a shock that the body and weight was Harmony as she slept against him, her head on his arm.

For a moment he almost wished it were possible to chew his arm off, just so he could be sure he didn’t wake her.

Instead, he moved with exaggerated care, managing to withdraw his arm only after several agonizing minutes. He wedged pillows against her body as he moved even more carefully to get out of the rumpled bed and away from her.

Free finally of the bed and her embrace, Angel crept silently to the bathroom where he took in the disaster that was his neck.

The bites were almost healed, for which he was thankful. He knew by the time he returned to Los Angeles, they would be completely gone.

He washed carefully and quietly, still fearful of waking her.

As he shook off the last dregs of sleep, he remembered the events of the evening, then heartily wished he could forget them again.

Pulling on clean clothes, and then easing his bag from the closet, he exited the room, pulling the door gently closed behind him, cringing as the lock clicked.

Standing perfectly still for only seconds, Angel turned and almost sprinted down the hallway to the office where he settled up his bill and included the next day as well, just to be sure Harmony wasn’t disturbed before he was well on his way back to L.A.

***********************************

Angel was halfway back to the city before the sun finally set and he could retract all the dark tinted shades inside the tinted windows. He mentally promised Cordelia a raise for having suggested the idea to him.

Finally able to relax, his mind wandered briefly back to the previous night.

Harmony actually was attractive, as long as she never spoke. She wasn’t Buffy, or even Cordy, for that matter, but she’d certainly been a spitfire in bed… Even more so than Darla had ever been, or even Buffy, for that matter. And while his body was happily relaxed, he still felt the strong need for a very cleansing bath.

His mind was anything but relaxed!

*************************************

Harmony woke to an empty room.

While disappointing, it was a relief in some ways. She felt good. Sore but good and just hadn’t wanted to have to let Angel down. With him gone, she could avoid that distasteful task. He’d been the best lover she’d ever had, with the slight streak of Angelus that had peeked out while he was drunk, but she wasn’t ready for a new relationship yet. She just hoped he’d get over her soon and not try to follow her.

In the meanwhile, she intended to make good use of this glittering city.

***************************************

“You’re back early from your vacation, Angel. Didn’t it go well?”

Wesley looked puzzled as to why the vampire was back so soon. They’d expected him to be gone for several more days.

“Yeah. It was fine, Wes. Just a bit boring and I wanted to come back and do a bit of research.” Angel set his bag inside the laundry chute; letting the entire thing slide down to the utility room they’d set up in a corner of the basement.

He unbuttoned the shirt, intending to toss it down as well, knowing that the bites were healed. He’d stopped outside of town just to check and make sure.

Just as he pulled the shirt off, Cordelia came around the corner behind him.

“Angel! I thought I heard you… What in the hell is on your back? What have you been doing, Angel?”

The brunette vampire heard the anger filling her voice and wondered what WAS on his back.

“I have no idea, Cordy. It must have been some prank. I got a bit drunk last night. The bar didn’t have anything but real alcohol and then some, ah, hoodlums snuck into my room late last night and woke me up. They must have played a joke or something.”

His mind raced, trying to figure out what Harmony had done. He’d not felt anything at all on his back. No bites, and he knew the scratches were healed, cause they no longer hurt.

“There is a big black magic-marker heart in the middle of your back that says ‘Broody-bear loves sweetie-cakes’. Who the hell is ‘broody-bear’ or more even interesting might be who ‘sweetie-cakes’ is…”

Cordelia glared at him, prepared to disbelieve anything he said.

“I have no idea, Cordelia. But if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll take a shower now.”

Angel sighed as he detoured through the kitchen for the can of comet cleanser he knew Cordelia kept under the sink. He just hoped it was sufficient to get the marker off his back and Harmony off his skin.

If they ever found out… He’d never live it down.

************************************

Lorne sat in his dressing room and wondered how Angel’s evening had gone the night before. He couldn’t wait to get back to L.A. to tease the vampire about Cordelia’s blonde friend, or her and Angel’s dismal attempt to sing…

Gillian Weaver 03/01/03

Lyrics By Joan Jett and The Blackhearts – ‘I Hate Myself For Loving You’